3.16.2005

Smells Like "Dumb Blonde"

Paris Hilton gets to a news conference to promote her perfume, Paris Hilton, which is like, wow, what a great name! I wonder how long it took her to come up with and where the inspiration came from?

You know, if she wasn't being forcefed to the nation (like Ashlee "My throat hurts and I was grown in a lab by MTV scientists" Simpson) she'd be okay. She's not very pretty but has nice hair and a good figure and all, but the blank expression says "Blehhhhhhhhhhhhhh". Actually, her personality, from the snippets I've been forced to endure from her pathetically stupid and overtly classist show, The Simple Life, is awful as well. She's stupid, childish and probably truly believes that her crap smells like roses.

So what does it smell like? Given the namesake, its probably over poweringly gaudy, floral with spices that's in your damned face and nose and there's no escaping it, kind of like Paris Hilton herself. But I'm going to go with it smells like "Dumb Blonde". I wonder what Jessica Simpson's Jessica Simpson perfume will smell like, what does "Idiot Bimbo" smell like?

[Update: I've been thinking about this some more and have a couple of other signature perfumes to suggest. Christina Aquilera's signature scent would be called "Skank" and would be great for covering up cigarettes and puke breath. Ashlee Simpson's scent would be called "Labrat" and would smell like a test tube with antiseptic. Anna Nicole Smith's would be called "Stoopid Tits" because that's essentially who and what she is, it would smell like her own BO because she seems to think she's the bestest thing ever and her stink would be her perfume.]

0 comments: