10.26.2010

This Week in Dumbphuckery

Welcome to Dumbphuckery, a lovely little town occupied by morons, racists, hypocrites, assholes and innocent victims of the aforementioned. Let's take a walk down Main Street and see what we can see.

There's Anthony Saenz, a 6-year-old boy suspended for toy gun at school because the Nerf gun violated the school's zero tolerance policy for weapons. Only thing is that a Nerf gun isn't a weapon, its a toy. I could do far more damage to someone with a rolled up magazine then I could with a Nerf gun. Anthony's been given a one-day suspension by the bureaucrats in his school system. Did I mention the kid is six? WTF? Zero tolerance should not resolve to zero intellect.


And over there we have Officer Louis Ramos a New York City Officer Charged With Hit and Run on Cyclist after driving the wrong way up a street, hitting a cyclist, he and his partner dragged the injured man to the curb, gave him a tissue (which I'm sure helped the guy with his broken wrist and multiple cuts and bruises) and then drove off without reporting it. Officer Ramos and his partner, Paris Anderson, were suspended without pay.

And over here we have the residents of Wasall County in the UK, Leaves in road not green waste, Walsall Council says. Their "logic", the leaves in the road could contain cigarette butts and/or dog poop and as such could not be recycled. The fine for accidentally adding what is clearly biomass to your recycling? One thousand pounds which I have no idea what that is in real money but it sounds like a lot.

Back in the good old idiotic USA, here's a town in Massachusetts that sent letters home to parents advising them that their children were fat. No really. Mixed views on tracking students' BMI. First off, BMI is a completely flawed metric for measuring a healthy body. It takes just two factors, height and weight, into account and derives a rating. It disregards the body's makeup and, as any athlete will tell you, muscle weighs more than fat. My own BMI has me as overweight, I'm 5'9" and 170 pounds, I still fit into the same size jeans I wore 20 years ago, I can see my feet and the reason my own BMI is off is because I'm substantially more muscular than most other people who do not exercise as much. I'm not overweight and neither is Shelby Sumner, the girl in the story who is 4'9" and 90 pounds, she's a competitive gymnast with a higher ratio of muscle to fat than other kids. But the real transgression here is that the school sent home letters to parents containing BMI information without any consideration for how this information might affect the kid. It is extremely easy to make a kid feel self conscious about anything and weight issues can fester and blossom into full blown anorexia, bulimia or any of a whole passel of mental health issues.

Oh and look here, we're at the WannaBe Political Coffeeshop! Let's listen in and see what the wannabe candidates have to say!
Christine O'Donnell - “America is a socialist economy. The definition of a socialist economy is when 50 percent or more of your economy is dependent on the federal government.” November 2009. Also, she's got some, uh, bizarre ideas about masturbation as well.
Rand Paul - "The fundamental reason why Medicare is failing is why the Soviet Union failed -- socialism doesn't work. You have ... no price fluctuation." June, 1998. More? Paul says he would not have voted for the Civil Rights Act of 1964. He also supports the elimination of the Department of Education. And he called Medicare "intergenerational welfare." Let's not even get started on Aqua Buddha.
Newt Gingrich - "I think one of the great problems we have in the Republican Party is that we don't encourage you to be nasty. We encourage you to be neat, obedient, loyal and faithful and all those Boy Scout words, which would be great around a campfire but are lousy in politics." He's also famously asked his wife to tolerate him keeping a mistress (to her credit, she was not and divorced him). Note, Gingrich was cheating on his wife while leading the charge against Bill Clinton for doing the exact same thing. Hypocritical much?

Ain't nothing wrong here!
Let's keep on walking through Dumbphuckery and see who else we can see.

Ah, the church, that bastion of integrity and safety and kid touching priests being shuffled around the country and the world in a bizarre and incredibly offensive game of cat and mouse but with preacher penis' instead of cats and children instead of mice. Abuse claims detailed in unsealed Ca. church docs.

I think that'll do for today's tour. Don't worry, we can come back and visit again. There is plenty more to see in lovely Dumpphuckery!
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