6.25.2010

Seesaw Crappers

I have not taken the extra step to verify if this is true so it may just be wild conjecture on my part but that's rarely stopped me from going off.

When I work in the school's district offices, there is one public bathroom per floor with a smattering (maybe a spattering?) of single toilet restrooms throughout the building. Because there is a men's and women's room right next to each other, all of the toilets are bolted to each other through the wall, that is, stall #1 in the men's room is directly bolted to stall #1 toilet in the women's room. And, if the our educational budget wasn't getting repeatedly carved up like a Thanksgiving turkey, the conjoined toilets would be kept bolted tightly together.

But since we've had rather large budget cuts every year for as long as I've been in education, the bolts and nuts holding the two together have loosened up.

The end result of which is that you sit down, the other toilet goes up. Not more than an inch or two but certainly enough to notice. And since I'm a man, most of the time when a lady sits on the other half of our crapper seasaw, the isn't large enough to seesaw me into the air. But sometimes she is and my toilet will gain a few inches of altitude.

Which, if you aren't ready for it is quite peculiar. It took me a week or so to figure out what was going on and now its hard to stop thinking about it. When my toilet goes up, there's a good sized lady on the other side of the way doing her business. And yes, I have seesawed the other person when I'm heavier than they are which makes me grin like a monkey with a fresh banana.

Who says there's no unintentional hilarity due to budget cut maintenance shortfalls? I know I don't!
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