6.14.2007

Paying to Clear Your Conscience is a Mindtrick

I came across a site and service called CheatNeutral that attempts to do for infidelity what the carbon neutral folks are doing for pollution emissions. That is, cheaters can buy a clear conscience by paying someone else to be monogamous.

Yes, you read that right. Men or women who sleep around on their spouses can pay off their guilt.

To which I'm going to have to shout at the top of my lungs, ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING?

I'm sure they are doing a brisk business though since guilt is an even easier sell lever to pull than impulse or impotence. Guilt sells more flowers and chocolates than joyous sentiment (actually it probably doesn't but I'm feeling cynical so bear with me). Guilt makes the purchaser feel better, like they are cleansing themselves of the reason they should feel guilty.

So purchased clear consciences for morally bankrupt people who sleep around behind their spouses back makes perfect, albeit nauseating, sense.

Here's a tip for any cheaters who happen to be reading this. If you want a clear conscience (pay attention now) then stop screwing someone you're not supposed to be screwing.

Purchasing guilt removal like this won't resolve your guilt, it'll just lighten your wallet and you'll still be a piece of shit cheating scumbag. Also, if you charge it to your credit card and your cheatee spouse sees it then you are sooooo totally busted.

[Update: Easy and his investigative team have revealed that the site is a farce and is really a big joke. Actually, he just read the site. I have eggs on my face but I'm headed into the shower now so I'm not overly worried. It is a pretty good mock up job. Check it out, Cheat Neutral.

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