5.04.2007

A Curious Way To Circumvent a Stupid Law

Activists Want Chimp Declared a 'Person' because, in Austria, only people are allowed to recieve personal donations and this chimp, named Hiasl, is facing an uncertain future after his sanctuary has gone bankrupt.

The thought behind the drive is laudable but it seems to me that it would be less loophole-y and a smarter long term strategy to go after the law that says only people can accept personal donations in Austria.

Instead they are going to try and prove that a personality and the appearance of thoughtfulness (note, I'm not saying he ISN'T a person but I'm not quite prepared to say he is, not just yet) does a person make. And that can create a slippery slope, as the head of the local Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals, Michael Antolini, thinks. If chimps are people and they can own property than what's to prevent the chimp from copyrighting his image? What's to prevent a chimp from obtaining real wealth? Heck, what's to stop a chimp from buying a business and having human employees?

We've all seen (the original, please) the Planet of the Apes and this is the start of that slippery slope down the evolutionary ladder. And yes, I am just kidding about that last bit.

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