Intellectual Poison

Does this really need any explanation? Tampon Blowgun

I didn't think so.

The next thing, of course, is someone will figure out a way to use a pressurized cylinder and a revolving barrel or other multi-shot capacity. And then we will read about cube farm tampon gun battles. And that will make me smile. I'm smiling right now just thinking about geeks blasting each other with tampons.

Tags: tampon, blowgun

Dear Brian Sabean, Larry Bahr and Felipe Alou,

Please stop expecting Armando Benitez to do his job. The guy sucks, he has been one of the worst trades for the Giants organization in years and is nowhere near worth $6 million a year. If I were you, I'd demand a refund.

How many saves in a row has he blown? How many games in the current six game, about to be seven game, losing streak are his fault? Too many for a guy making the kind of money he is making.

So here, instead of just complaining about him, I'll offer a solution. Let me close for the Giants. I could hardly do a worse job and my hamstrings are still attached to my ass, unlike Benitez and his gimpy old beat-up body. I've got a high 80's fast ball and I can promise you that no player has ever seen me pitch and I'll finish out the season for you for a mere $200,000, a fraction of what is being paid Benitez.

Please, please bench the fool or use him in middle relief so the team has a chance to fix his errors. While I am quite happy with the acquisition of Hillenbrand, you traded away the only other decent closer prospect in Jeremy Accardo.

Oh yeah, and please have Felipe talk to Pedro Feliz about that first pitch swinging garbage, in two games on this road trip he saw eight total pitches in eight ABs and didn't get a hit at all. He needs to be more patient and actually swing at decent stuff instead of hacking and hoping.

I expect that you will get this sorted out before next Friday when I am coming up for the game against the Rockies. If not then give me a call and I'll start working on my slideball.

Sincerely,
Johnny Huh

PS. If money is tight, you can sign my two year old to close for a mere $100,000. He can't make it to the plate all the time but at least he'd be cheap and he's awfully cute too.

[Update: Yep, its official, Benitez has now caused the seventh straight loss for the Giants. How many more before Felipe benches him in favor of the bat boy?]

Tags: San Francisco, Giants, baseball, Benitez sucks, SF Giants

Fast food is, by and large, poison but these ten fast foods are like turbo-poison.

The winner in the pack? I thought it was Pizza Hut's Stuffed Crust Meat Lover’s pie, two slices of this will stuff you with 1,000 calories, 82 grams of total fat, 22 grams of it saturated. But no, the "champ" is the Burger King Triple Whopper with Cheese (don't forget to order the Diet Coke!) that is loaded with a gut-wrenching 82 grams of fat with 32 of those being saturated. Nasty! And that's not including the Vat 'o Fries on the side.

And some people wonder why we have an obesity epidemic in this country. People are more sedentary than ever before, people are eating more and more fatty meat burgers (the BK Stackers are thoroughly disgusting, four patties and cheese? Bleh). X-Ray and MRI machines are having trouble penetrating the the ginormous fat people. Hospitals are having to have gurneys that can carry 1,000 pound people, special doctors need to be called in.

Its sickening and pathetic.

Get up off your big, fat ass America. You wonder how we've gone from being a producer to being consumers? This is how. This addiction to gluttony, this addiction to fat and high fructose corn syrup combined with a near pathological fear of movement that could be construed as exercise. America has become a nation of watchers, happy to sit on the couch and watch people do things on tv. Happy to sit in the stands and watch people do things on a field. All while stuffing deep fried shit into their maws without even a thought.

I hate that two thirds of this country is considered fat or obese. I hate that we are thought of the world around as a soft, stupid and ever fatter nation of greedheaded SUV drive-thru addicted losers with a bizarrely held superiority complex that all things American are soooo much better.

Fast food isn't just made and served fast, it'll put you in the ground fast too.

Tags: obesity, fast food, addiction, gluttony

Kids these days, they'll sniff, inhale, drink or inject anything to catch a buzz. What's the latest way the idiot kids are doing it? Mothballs. Yeah, those really stinky things your grandparents smell like.

Teenagers Hospitalized from Inhaling Mothballs

The operative things to remember from this story. It took one of the twin sisters six months to recover from her stupidity. The other took three months to recover. Do you really want to waste a half of a year because you're too cheap to go buy a dime bag?

I'm not going to say don't do drugs because that's pretty unrealistic these days. Just like not giving kids access to condoms isn't going to stop them from having sex. But if you're going to get high, at least do it with something that isn't going to put you in the hospital and give you dragon skin or worse.

Tags: mothballs, inhalation, hospitalization, don't try this at home, mothball inhalation

This is absolutely awesome. A guy figured out his neighbors were free riding on his Wifi and, instead of locking it down, decided to have some fun with them.

Check it out!

Tags: Wifi, code-fu, funny, awesome

These are obvious spinoffs from my post the other day about Maury.

deleleerious - wary of the bad effects of a chosen course of action

deliterious - a delicatessan that serves food that's really, really bad for you.

Tags: deleleerious, deliterious, fictionarium, new words, inventing language, NWotD, deleleerious, deliterious

So I found out tonight that I've had a whole bunch of my photos added into Flickr's Explore pages.

In fact, I've had 65 photos featured! Woohoo!

And, to add a caboose onto the cool train, my photo of Nande's Air Flop hit 100 favorites today! Another cool first for me.

Man, I loves me some Flagrant Disregard!

Tags: Flickr, Explore, Flagrant Disregard, Flickr

So now, according to cops in Philadelphia, you cannot use your cellphone to take a picture of something that is happening in plain public view if that view happens to include police officers arresting someone. Notwithstanding the fact that the kid was on his own property at the time of the arrest

Cell Phone Picture Called Obstruction Of Justice because, you know, taking pictures of the cops beating the shit out of a perp obstructs their ability to mete out street justice. Though, to be fair, in this instance, they were merely arresting a drug dealer and the kid wanted a photo of it.

The kid, according to the cops, broke a new law that prohibits people from taking pictures of police with cell phones. Which is pretty well squarely aimed at preventing people from documenting abusive cops so as to sue the hell out of them for police brutality. And without phot or video evidence, its much harder to prove that the police have behaved in a brutal and unnecessary fashion.

Strangely, the story doesn't mention anything about it being illegal to take photos of the police with a regular camera. Which he could have done from inside the house where they wouldn't have even known he was there.

"There is no law that prevents people from taking pictures of what anybody can see on the street," said Larry Frankel of the American Civil Liberties Union. "I think it's rather scary that in this country you could actually be taken down to police headquarters for taking a picture on your cell phone of activities that are clearly visible on the street."

It is not only the right of the people but it is incumbent upon the people to make sure that the police and other officials are not overstepping their authority. And photo documentation of those abuses is paramount to these checks and balances.

Taking away the tools by which we the people secure our rights is yet another step on the road towards Happy Cheneyland, that is, fascism.

Tags: fascism, cameraphone, wrongful detention, civil liberties, violation

Today's new word should have come to me when I came up with smackcess and schmuckcess but it didn't. It had to germinate a bit more before it fully came to me.

Sexcess - successful sex, duh. Or, alternatively, excess sex but I'm not sure if that even exists.

And, upon a quick Google, this word is not new, its been in use by hipsters for a while. Sigh.

Oh well, tomorrow will see a couple of new new words. So there!

Tags: sexcess, fictionarium, new words, inventing language, NWotD, sexcess

This is beyond strange, its the 10th Annual Self-Transcendence 3,100 Mile Race which takes place in Queens. Now 3,100 miles is a really long way to go and they are supposed to average 60 miles a day for nearly two months.

And the kicker? They run around a single city block, again and again and again. Some 5,000 laps. In the city, on pavement.

Has it begun to sound like a bad idea yet? They lost me at 3,100 miles and then really lost me at the around a single city block concept. I mean, I get the underlying concept of transcendance by repetitive motion but this just seems kind of stupid really. City air is bad for you, city streets are bad for your joints to run upon and this much over-training is really bad for your entire body. It seems to me that this would be more detrimental to the physical condition than helpful.

Which might explain why there are only 14 competitors.

Tags: running, 3100 miles, one city block, longest race

You probably haven't heard about a recent attempted rape at gunpoint in Seabright, a small neighborhood in Santa Cruz, which is why I'm posting it here.

Seabright was my neighborhood for the majority of my time living in town before we bought a house a few miles down the road. Seabright is a small neighborhood where alot of people know each other, where people feel comfortable and mostly safe.

But not anymore, not now. Not after some horny thug knocked a woman to the ground and tried to tear her clothes off while pointing a gun at her.

Now, Seabright's had its share of crime but nothing especially serious for a long, long time and that's how they like it. Years ago there was a serial peeper and bikes get ripped off from time to time But an aggravated sexual assault with a firearm involved has really set the neighborhood on edge. And the community is going to come together, get the news out, protect each other and catch this ratass fool before he tries again.

And he'd better hope that the cops get him before some of the more aggressively defensive folks around town find him or there won't be enough of him left over to put on trial.

But let this attempted rape be a wake up call, be aware of your surroundings, set up your lights to come on automatically around your house, report suspicious activities and don't let your guard down. In other news, Oakland recorded its 78th murder of the year, nearly double where they were last year and that's just sad. Many of the murders have been what appear to be random acts of violence, drive-by's and the like. Such a waste of life, so sad.

Tags: Seabright, attempted rape, community, attempted rape

News of the pending nuptuals for Kid Rock and Pam Anderson have reached even my densely resistant brain. And I see some folks are surfing through Intellectual Poison looking for some meat to chew on about these news.

Sorry kids, no new news, except a prediction that this too shall pass and Pam will become single again and wank fodder for a generation that grew up on Baywatch. Though I guess she's still wank fodder if she's married. I mean, look at what happened to her level of celebrity after the sex video was leakedstolen.

I don't know, I can't really generate enough give a damn to give a damn. In news that i can generate some give a damn about, Ryan's announced his own pending nuptuals. To which I say, Melissa, run away, run away really really fast. Oh shit, that's right, Ryan's a runner. Maybe you should take a cab. (Side note, everytime I type nuptuals it looks wrong, why is that? Aaaah, because it is wrong, that makes me feel better even if it sounds right my way.)

Nah, just ribbing ya, Ryan. Congratulations dude!

Tags: Pam Anderson, Kid Rock, yawn, wedding

Yes, I wanted to use the word deleterious today and now I have. And its seeded some new words I'll put together later.

Talk shows are, by their nature, crap. They vie for ratings by doing over the top episodes and Maury, which comes on right after our morning news show, is among the worst.

They love to do paternity tests on couples so that, when the man is the father, the mother gets all up in his face calling him a liar and all kinds of bleeped out abuse. It is horrible to watch and I generally change the channel. But alot of people do not.

And what they see are people who have brought a new life into the world being physically, verbally and emotionally abusive to each other. To the point that, occasionally, fists start flying. These are people that are supposed to be working together to raise a decent human being. But instead they use the test results like a club to bludgeon their "partner" with.

And people that view this garbage take note that this is acceptable behaviour. The same thing goes for reality shows that focus on the anger in interpersonal relationships and over-the-top behaviour being totally acceptable. In the absence of positive role models, this is what they base their interactions upon and society as a whole draws ever closer to the gutter.

America is a more vicious and hateful place because of this sort of drivel that passes for entertainment. And that's a messed up thing too, people watch other people be spiteful and hateful towards each other for entertainment. Its almost as bad as the "halftime show" at Roman gladiatorial contests when lions would come out and shred defenseless slaves for the spectators amusement. And yes, it is a sign of the decline of our nation.

Please, America, turn off garbage like Maury, garbage like Jenny Jones (if she's still on the air), garbage like Montel (who, admittedly, does have some decent and real topics on his shows as well as the scandal garbage). If you must watch garbage talk shows, watch ones that are actually trying to improve people. Oprah is one of those shows, Dr. Phil is one too (although his overly sanctimonious personality wears really thin on me in about ten seconds), Tyra Banks is another. If you must watch this stuff, stay with the glass half full shows and avoid morally bankrupt garbage like Maury. Please. Your fellow human beings will thank you.

And, for the pending comment that I should just turn off the tube. It is off. And the silence is blissful (the baby is sleeping in his swing right now).

Tags: Maury, garbage, deleterious, Maury

Today's new word gets backmy comedy roots, scatology. So let's get down to it.

Oppoonent - when the person you are competing against plays like shit or, alternatively, when your competition craps his pants during the game.

[Update: My pal Ryan, of Rambling Rhodes, offered another new word for the Fictionarium and I absolutely love it.

Reintardation: When someone says something so retarded, their entire reputation is altered forever because of it.]

Tags: oppoonent, reintardation, fictionarium, new words, inventing language, NWotD, oppoonent, reintardation

What happens when lawyers who haven't been specifically hired to find ways for Bush to do whatever he pleases and trounce all over laws he's just signed? Well, they're in pretty much complete agreement, George Bush is flagrantly violating the Constitution and the law of the land without any legal grounds to do so.

Wired News has the article. Here's the second through fourth paragraphs that effectively frame the concerns raised by his selective legal interpretations, emphasis mine.
The ABA group, which includes a one-time FBI director and former federal appeals court judge, said the president has overstepped his authority in attaching challenges to hundreds of new laws.

The attachments, known as bill-signing statements, say Bush reserves a right to revise, interpret or disregard measures on national security and constitutional grounds.

"This report raises serious concerns crucial to the survival of our democracy," said the ABA's president, Michael Greco. "If left unchecked, the president's practice does grave harm to the separation of powers doctrine, and the system of checks and balances that have sustained our democracy for more than two centuries."

Read that slowly or allow me to translate, Bush is signing laws that he claims do not necessarily apply to him if he chooses not to. Bush is claiming that the President of the US is above the law of the land when the reality is that he is supposed to be the role model for the law, he's supposed to be the Knight in Shining Armor of the Constitution. The president is not above the law, he cannot be.

Tags: Bush, Constitution, have we met?, democracy

Apparently though, they only have just the one look. Don't believe me? Here's a Paris Hilton Montage and then a Lindsey Lohan Montage. Can you say vacuous? How about "This space for rent"? Yeah.

Kind of creepy but I bet most models could do this as well.

Tags: montage, Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan, vacuous

Today's new word just poofed into my head this morning as I was trying to get back to sleep for a little more.

Goddled - coddled by God.

Which, of course, gives rise to...

Guddled - cuddled by God.

Tags: Goddled, Guddled, fictionarium, new words, inventing language, NWotD, Goddled

So I got my latest eBay goodie from the UPS guy who couldn't wait to get off my porch and away from my goon hound who was barking and trying to be a tough dog (which she pulls off quite well as the door-to-door religious salespeople keep finding out).

My newest gadget? A pair of Logitech Bluetooth iPod headphones. And my initial impression is that they totally and absolulely kick ass! The sound quality is excellent, the range is good and the ease of getting the system to work was awesome. And, to top it off, both the headphones and the adapter are rechargable and even recharge off the same cord! Very nice!

Now I'll be able to kick out the jams during my workouts without having to figure out where to put the iPod. Which was always a problem because I do circuits right now and there's no one place that it can sit without getting in the way at some point during the routine. Now, the iPod sits on my desk and I can control it remotely. The headphones have play/pause, volume up and down and previous song and next song capabilities.

Overall, I'm very, very pleased with these new phones. My only complaint is that the adapter is not universal, it can only be used with my iPod so far as I can tell. I would love to be able to plug it into my tv so I can play my Playstation without bothering the rest of the house. But that's alright, I can live with it.

My next step is to try out the system out on my bike and see how it performs there. But really, it has already completed its primary mission of freeing me up from my iPod while I workout, everything else is just gravy!

My other tech news is that I had to replace my Canon SD450 through my Staples warranty. It had somehow gotten its screened cracked and was pretty well useless. But the cool part is that Staples had the cameras on sale and, with the credit from the last one, the new one cost a whopping $1.50 with the 2 year warranty attached again! Yeeha! I love it when that happens! And I really hate being with a camera.

And, as an aside, I'm trying an additional tagging system because I've never been impressed with Technorati's results. I very, very rarely get traffic because of the tags I've added (according to SiteMeter's reports) so I'm trying Del.icio.us tags to see how they compare. Now, if only Blogger would incorporate tagging into the blogging engine so I didn't have to hand add them each time.

Tags: iPod, bluetooth, logitech, ipod, bluetooth, logitech

Nice action for the SF Giants today by Ray Durham. A two run home run earlier in the game and then a two run game winning single in the bottom of the ninth to end it.

Very, very nice action!

And why yes, it was due in part to Barry Bonds' pinch hit single to get the inning started.

Tags: Ray+Durham, Giants, baseball

Oh yeah, kids and kiddies, that Godless! Woot, the siren of idiocy cannot sell her retarded book so the Conservative Book Club will give you a copy for just giving them a whole bunch of marketing information (and I think you have to promise not to be gay).

Seriously, Godless? Come on now, if there IS a God, do you really think he/she/it would want you talking about genocide and kicking Canada's ass and kicking Australia's ass and hunting lib'ruls down for sport? You're not that thick but your demographic is, they lap up your drivel like angel's spit.

I'm usually against giving any sort of publicity to 'noid fools like Coulter (shh, don't say her name three times or she'll jump out of the nearest toilet) but she's no longer a person, she's a cartoon character, a spoof of her own ridiculousness.

I wonder how many copies of her book have been sold versus how many have been given away? Its an old trick in the magazine business, pump up your circulation by giving free subscriptions to offices, higher circulation means you can charge higher ad rates. Though in the case of Godless, it just becomes another meaningless "fact" to be thrown around during the endless talking head shows on MSNBC, Fox and CNN. Here let me demonstrate. Picture a heated discussion between Hannity and Colmes and Hannity refutes Colmes with "Godless has sold more than 5 million copies, how can you dispute that her message is reaching America and America is accepting it?" When the reality is that they printed out 5 million copies, gave away 4 million, sold about 50 and have about a million sitting in a warehouse. And the "fact" isn't disputed by Colmes, its accepted into the media as fact and all of a sudden America has embraced her "message". Its shenanigans but high stakes shenanigans.

She spews her intentionally wrong bile, she riles up the lib'rul 'idgets and the GOP gets a good belly laugh at all the fun. Meanwhile, their buddies are stuffing their pockets with billions of misappropriated dollars. Its not a game but they're playing it like one and its filthy despicable assholes like Coulter that help empower them to keep doing it.

I hope and assume that the irony of her title has not escaped her. I have more God in my atheist pinky than she has in her entire gangly sack of bones. That she is even paid attention to by anyone (much like Rush "Facts are for Liberals" Limbaugh) just blows my mind. How unthinking do you have to be to not see these cretins for what they are?

Its hard to believe that they are my countrymen and women. Don't get me wrong, I don't dispute Coulter her right to write books containing nothing but misinformed drivel. The bothersome thing is that some people are actually duped into buying the books and actually reading them.

Tags: Godless, irony, lives

Orgameism - achieving orgasm through video game victory. Leading to, of course, the simultaneous orgameism when orgasm and victory occur at the same time.

Tags: orgameism, fictionarium, new words, inventing language, NWotD

WalMart is working overtime to try and capture the minds of the kids with a space to let them express their individuality as long as it passes their censors.

Seriously, WalMart, you are about as uncool as it gets and half-assed crap like this just makes you look cheap and stupid.

The article is on Advertising Age, Wal-Mart Tries to Become MySpace and basically concludes that this is a pathetic attempt to collect children's minds so they'll shop at WalMart. It has nothing to do with kids expressing themselves since there are so many things that they cannot publish or write (a slag on WalMart? um, no, anything even remotely positive about Target? um, no).

A site espousing freedom and then barring any "objectionable content" is about as unfree and uncool as can be. And the kids interviewed for the article weren't buying it at all.

Sorry, WalMart, you still suck.

Tags: Wal-Mart, WalMart, schoolyourway, lame, MySpace, ripoff

When graphic artists get bored . . .

Tags: cool

Can someone explain why I would want a television built into my refridgerator?

Tags: WTF, television, refridgerator

Circumcision may stop millions of HIV deaths: "'In West Africa, male circumcision is common and the prevalence of HIV is low, while in southern Africa the reverse is true,' they wrote in the current report, published in the Public Library of Science Medicine."

This isn't definitive but it certainly is a strong argument for circumcising boys. The study estimates that if all African men were circumcised over the next ten years then 2 million infections and 300,000 deaths could be avoided.

The pyschological effect of having a penis that doesn't look funny (truth be told, a clipped penis looks almost as silly as an unclipped penis but the unclipped easily wins) was not a part of the study.

Tags: circumcision, Africa, HIV, AIDS

These are probably not a good idea to read before bed. LinkFilter had a link to Stop Prisoner Rape's Survivor Stories and I found that its hard to stop reading them once you've started. They are real, they are personal and some of them are really difficult to get through because of the graphic stories. Some prisoners said that the act of writing it out actually helped them feel a little better about themselves in the wake of often brutal and often serial sexual assaults in dark corners of our prison system.

They are not safe for work and you might just be better off not reading them at all if you think you might not want to know. But they are worth reading, its worth gaining the perspective of the imprisoned through their words to see how helpless and oftentimes hopeless their situation may seem. It is a truly scary glimpse into a world that I hope to never experience firsthand. Nor would I wish it on anyone else.

From the site...
SPR seeks to end sexual violence committed against men, women, and youth in all forms of detention.

"The horrors experienced by many young inmates, particularly those who are convicted of nonviolent offenses, border on the unimaginable. Prison rape not only threatens the lives of those who fall prey to their aggressors, but it is potentially devastating to the human spirit. Shame, depression, and a shattering loss of self-esteem accompany the perpetual terror the victim thereafter must endure."
U.S. Supreme Court Justice Harry A. Blackmun, Farmer v. Brennan

Commit a crime and do your time, that's fine but should you really have to be worried about getting fucked in the mouth and ass by some lifer pricks with nothing to lose? Who was it that said the way to judge a society is by how they treat their criminals? Or was it old people? Either way, we treat them both like shit, old people get neglected and beaten and criminals get raped and stabbed with sharpened toothbrushes over some stupid pride or ego issue.

Tags: stop prisoner rape, survivor stories, linkfilter, NSFW

The Army has gotten tired of its abusive and exploited relationship with Halliburton and has broken off its monopoly contracts with them in order to see if other service companies can do the same job without the massive overcharges and without funnelling large amounts of money directly in the Vice President's pockets since that's, well just a little bit crooked and disgusting. In other words, the Army wants to remain friends but is reserving the right to see other people and companies to find out if they can be treated better.

Its the beginning of the political posturing season but I like the direction of the first salvo for the upcoming elections wherein the US Army has told Halliburtonn that it will have to rebid and compete with multiple vendors for service contracts in Iraq. The full post is over on IP Politik and links to this article.

Now, why wasn't this policy undertaken originally? Oh yeah, so Dick Cheney could make a shitload of money for himself and his pals. Hmm, and Halliburton is being investigated for overcharging for its services in Iraq too?

In other news, Ken Lay's recent death may make his widow very, very rich. There's some rumor that all his stolen and dirty money will go to her since he died after being convicted and before being sentenced. Which is a fucking travesty of justice. Every penny that prick stole should go directly to the pensions of all those Enron folks who got screwed over. And whatever's left over should be refunded to the people of California since we're the one's he stole it from originally.

Stay tuned for fake GOP and "conservative" outrage over gay people getting married, flag burning and whatever lame ass wedge issues the Rove Corps can dredge up to desperately try to hold on to power even though the GOP has been utterly terrible in running the show on their own.

I hate election season. The disconnect between what is really important and the GOP messaging is infuriating. Gay marriage is unimportant in the face of the war, in the face of the widening gap between rich and not-rich, flag burning is unimportant in light of the president's use of the Constitution and Bill of Rights for toilet paper and deciding that he is, according to his bobblehead lawyers, above the law, whichever law he chooses. The President of the USA is supposed to be a role model for behaviour, what example is George W. Bush setting with his policies? Where is the leadership?

Tags: US Army, Halliburton, no deal, Ken Lay, Enron, injustice

Congratulations Italy, you won the World Cup. I didn't watch it but I saw the highlights on ESPN, including the shootout to decide the best soccer team in the universe (well, known universe).

I stopped watching the World Cup a week or two ago. I got tired of the crappy officiating and the incredibly lame ass flopping garbage.

If soccer is the greatest game on the planet then why is the winner decided by a shootout? Why not just let them play until someone scores a goal the real way? A shootout isn't soccer or football, why can't they just keep playing?

And why not have more officials on the field? And some damned instant replay so that they can get the calls right? And so that they can catch and eject the flopping wanks, you know, the ones that don't even get touched and they act like someone shot, stabbed and then rubbed salt in the wounds. I truly hate that acting is a major part of the game.

Greatest sport on earth? I don't know about that. It seems like its got a ways to go before it can lay claim to that title. I don't know what is the greatest sport on earth right now but I don't think its soccer (football, whatever).

And yeah, I played the sport for something like 11 years when I was a kid. Then I wanted to play other sports like lacrosse and running cross country. In retrospect, I was cheated out of the chance to ride mountain bikes competitively in high school because they were just starting to hit then and most kids still rode ten speeds.

But back to the World Cup. Let me sum up the entire thing in one nice, easy to remember word: Meh! I'd rather watch baseball. And I did.

Tags: World Cup, football, soccer, bad officiating, flopping is teh lame, men

I took this yesterday evening after Graydon's 2nd Birthday Party. We had a bbq and a cool bounce house with obstacles to play around on inside. And a lion pinata stuffed with candy.

Graydon played all day without a nap until everyone from the party had gone home. Then he crashed for a while and then we got to get some bonus time in the bounce house. Just the two of us chasing each other and diving through things and bouncing off of walls and the floor. And laughing and laughing and laughing.

I can give a very happy two thumbs up for using a bounce house for a party. I can't recommend the company since I had to call them a day later to come and get the thing. Although that did mean that Grady and I got another round of bouncing fun this morning. And no, big kids weren't supposed to go in it. Next year's will have the rock wall and slide which is big kid approved.

I had more fun with my little boy than I can remember. Which is funny because we have fun all the time. He is more happy than anything else and his joy of life and discovery makes everything new and more fun for me as well. He's a wonderful little boy.

Tags: birthday, party, bounce house

Sometimes its good to be reminded of just how truly fortunate I am. I'm healthy, I've got two beautiful little boys, a beautiful wife, a crazy dog and a big fat mortgage.

But sometimes its good to have an external reminder.

Something like, oh, I don't know, how about a dog born with no front legs (YouTube link) that learns how to walk upright. Its crazy, its kind of creepy but it is, ultimately, heartwarming and amazing and wonderful.

Tags: perspective, dog, dog born with no front legs

It is because of things like the List of Problems Solved by MacGyver and Chuck Norris Facts (which, incidentally ranks higher than ChuckNorris.com on the Google results.

MacGyver was a great show, aside from the mullet and the fact that nobody ever died, ever. Beside that, it was entertaining to watch MacGyver figure out a way out of the problem with what he had on hand.

Tags: MacGyver, list of problems solved, Chuck Norris, intarnets

Ken Lay is dead or he's been taken "underground" by his buddy, Dubya.

But they apparently performed an autopsy on a body they said was Lay's. No foul play. Just dead from heart disease.

Boo hoo. Sorry dude but you stole a bunch of my money personally and I never did get a chance to kick you in the nuts for it. Its not like he would have gone to Folsom or real prison, nah, he would have gone to Rich White Guy prison where he'd live out his days in more luxury than free people without money. At least now we don't have to pay to keep him in prison.

Now the only thing left to do is wait for the President of the US to demonstrate what a completely out of touch douchebag he is and say what a fine man Ken Lay was, just like Tom Delay and Duke Cunningham. Funny how the President has so many friends with, shall we say, loose moral values?

Tags: Ken Lay, death, Enron, crook