When You Gotta Make a Call, RectumBell!

Cell phones found inside four prisoners with a bunch of extra chips and even a phone charger stuffed up one poor guy's butt.

Why? So they could direct their criminal enterprises outside the prison from inside. Makes perfect sense, somehow.

And now I will spend the rest of the day playing the Batman theme in my head with the words - Nah, nah, nah, nah, nah eh nah eh nah eh nah, nah eh nah Buttphone! Oh yeah, I went there.

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