8.10.2005

Words Fail Me

The intolerant hate mongers hiding behind children and the Bible at Focus on Your Child would like to help you answer the question: Is My Child Becoming Homosexual?

And don't you worry, Xtian soldiers, help is available. Intensive therapy can bury your child's natural desires and replace them desires of your choosing! Does Timmy like to play with Barbies too much for your liking? We'll reprogram that little bugger (oops, little guy) so that Barbie is for "fags" and GI Joe is for real boys.

And the best part is that playing with GI Joe as a kid makes him much more susceptible to "Bang the drum slowly" recruitment drives for incredibly stupid illegal oil wars. You son will want to enlist and he won't even know why! Halleluhahgobble!

So parents, print out the checklist, make sure your Timmy is looking to be a Betty. Make sure you're Tabitha isn't looking to be a Tommy. Its important. You need to make sure Teh Gay doesn't infect your children or they'll like boys when they should like girls and that's just so icky.

We can eradicate the scourge of gay love but only with intensive therapy, electrodes, powerful drugs and your help.

Oh yes, and don't forget to stop by the Ministry and give thanks to God for being a part of his grand plan. Halleluhahgobble.

Okay, this is ridiculous. There are sexual re-education camps that parents are sending their children to in order to make sure they don't "go gay" like its as simple as paper or plastic. It doesn't work that way and the attempts to force it to work that way are just going to result in more and more Republicans asshats being "outed" in their mid-40's for being hypocritical dickwads.
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