Intellectual Poison

New Cheddar X Questions are Up!
This week's questions have just been posted to the Cheddar X. Some good ones to think about and respond to.
I will likely have my responses up tomorrow as today's going to be rush all day. Loads of fun but I'll probably sneak in a post or two anyway.

The Cheddar X is, for those who aren't familiar with it yet, is a more or less weekly set of quetions put together from playas and from me. Things that we're thinking about that aren't the surface scratchers that the Friday Five pumps out every week. Its a free form sort of forum that welcomes input and participation.

The group seems to expand a little more each week and its a blast to read everyone else's responses. Check it out and join up.

We now return to the regularly scheduled rantings, freakish news stories, humourous forwards and whatever else tickles my type-it-up bone.

[Update: Go and check out Stiletto Philosophy for an excellent example of the Cheddar X done right!]

Thursday Morning News Wrap
Just a few of the news stories that have caught my eye this morning.
SBC Sues RIAA for Overly Broad Subpeonas and the RIAA comment? "We're very dissappointed that SBC didn't lie down and allow us to rape their database so we can launch even more completely stupid lawsuits that will kill any remaining good will towards the RIAA and will speed our inevitable demise because all dinosaurs must die out some day but we're taking as much of your money as we can steal before we go." Or something to that effect, I think it was shorter when they said it.
Bush Rejects Calls for Same Sex Marriages but he's got no qualms against pimping himself for the black vote even though he couldn't give the first damn about them either. But the idea of two men being married or two women is appalling to the simpering CIC? Whatever, I just wish he'd go back to Texas where his stupidity will just blend right in with the scenery and no one will give a damn about this narrow minded nimrod. But at least he's right in line with the Vatican, eh? Vatican Slams Moves to Legalize Same-Sex Marriage
The Economy's Up, Jobless Claims are Down so go out and get yourself another credit card and be a good little patriot and run up some consumer debt to get our economy going again. I still don't see very many decent jobs in the paper. But oh wait, what's this?
Defense Spending Driving US Economy, oh so that's what's doing it? The illegal oil war in Iraq is boosting the economy which means that none of the lower income levels are seeing any benefit, just fat fucks with more money than they'll ever need in ten lifetimes.

Which reminds me, why is called Defense Spending when we're obviously not using it for defense but for offense? Is it the same as that old Pro is the opposite of Con so Progress is the opposite of Congress? Yeah probably..

And finally, a humourous but poignant list of why golf is a better sport than most others. Thanks to Jay for sending it along to me. It does raise some interesting points.

Ever wonder why golf is growing in popularity and people who don't even play go to tournaments or watch it on TV?
These truisms may shed light on reasons why.
- Golf is an honorable game, with the overwhelming majority of players being honorable people who don't need referees.
- Golfers don't have some of their players in jail every week.
- Golfers don't scratch their privates on the golf course.
- Golfers don't kick dirt on, or throw bottles at, other people.
- Professional golfers are compensated in direct proportion to how well they play.
- Golfers don't get per diem and two seats on a charter flight when they travel between tournaments.
- Golfers don't hold out for more money, or demand new contracts, because of another player's deal.
- Professional golfers don't demand that the taxpayers pay for the courses on which they play.
- When golfers make a mistake, nobody is there to cover for them or back them up.
- The PGA Tour raises more money for charity in one year than the National Football League does in two.
- You can watch the best golfers in the world up close, at any tournament, including the majors, all day, every day for $25 or $30.
- The cost for a seat in the nosebleed section at the Super Bowl will cost around $300 or more.
- You can bring a picnic lunch to the tournament golf course, watch the best in the world and not spend a small fortune on food and drink. Try that at one of the taxpayer funded baseball or football stadiums.
- In golf you cannot fail 70% of the time and make $9 million a season, like the best baseball hitters (. 300 batting average) do.
- Golf doesn't change its rules to attract Fans.
- Golfers have to adapt to an entirely new playing area each week.
- Golfers keep their clothes on while they are being interviewed.
- Golf doesn't have free agency.
- In their prime, Greg Norman, Arnold Palmer and other stars, would shake your hand and say they were happy to meet you. In his prime Jose Canseco wore T-shirts that read "Leave Me Alone."
- You can hear birds chirping on the golf course during a tournament.
- At a golf tournament, (unlike at taxpayer-funded sports stadiums and arenas) you won't hear a steady stream of four letter words and nasty name calling while you're hoping that no one spills beer on you.
- Tiger Woods can hit a golf ball three times as far as Barry Bonds can hit a baseball.
- Golf Courses don't ruin the neighborhood.
- This is a slice of golf history I thought you might enjoy. I never knew why there were 18 holes before this. Why do full-length golf courses have 18 holes, and not 20, or 10 or an even dozen? How many of you
golfers know the answer to this one?
During a discussion among the club's membership board at St. Andrews in 1858, one of the members pointed out that it takes exactly 18 shots to polish off a fifth of Scotch. By limiting himself to only one shot of Scotch per hole, the Scot figured a round of golf was finished when the Scotch ran out.

Priceless Kobe Action
Just got this sent on to me by Jay and its gotta go up on the site immediately.
Enjoy! I know this made me laugh out loud which caused some looks in my office but oh well.

Spreading Wrongness
This is so WRONG with a big thanks to Metafilter for the link.
Warning, you'll wish you had not looked at the pictures on the other end of this link.

And no, I'm not kidding but I'm also posting the pic so I just don't know what to think.
Enjoy?

No Time to Blog
There's plenty to blog on today but there's just no time with a bunch of deadlines fast approaching.

But here's a very brief rundown on the new joys visited upon me this week.

- I've realized that there's a new noise disturbance for every day of the week now
- The old house that I'm subletting now, yeah, they're being evicted and the landlady is threatening to sue me for the lost rent, and there is plenty more to this tale to be told, it will get blogged
- More wedding joy and expense
- We're going to see Dave Matthews this weekend at the Shoreline which should be a good time
- Next week is LinuxWorld in San Francisco, I'll be there signing up developers for my company but this week is all about prepping for the show
- So far the reaction to the Save the Date mailing has been less than what P was hoping for but that's only one response and I don't think anyone will realize that these were made entirely by the two of us. Not printed for us, designed, refined and printed by us. And yes, she should be proud of how well they turned out

So there ya go, the thirty second run down on what's up.
Gotta go and get cranking some more though.

Land Scout
P and I are starting to take a look at real estate and its sickening to find out what people are expecting for houses out here these days. Still.
In the light of a recession that's abused this area pretty well there are still plenty of folks with cash (I'm guessing they cashed out of the boom before it crumpled). Which is great for them but it means we have a still over inflated housing market.

Think a million bucks for a two bedroom about a block from the beach with no yard, no privacy and no second story.

So, with the concept of buying a house pretty much ruled out by insanity, I've been digging into buying some land in the area and building our own house on it. So I am now a Land Scout, which sounds kind of cool.

Yesterday was the first trip we've taken to go and check out some land we're potentially interested in. Its up in the redwoods and would be workable but we couldn't get to the exact address as the realtor didn't have it handy. But the area is more vertical than horizontal so it will cost a ton just to get to the point where we can build. Its not out yet but its on the way.

And I'm tempted to look nationally to see if there's more reasonable housing available somewhere else where the job market is better as well. I mean, paying $50K for land isn't bad but if it costs another $50k to get it buildable then that's alot more expensive, eh?

But it's been an interesting experience that was mirrored for a while by a co-worker who was starting the process of getting a loan to buy a house. After having all the number run and figuring out what it would all cost him on a monthly basis he has since decided to keep renting for now. With fees, interest, insurance or home owner's dues and everything else it would have been costing him more than $3000 a month to buy a house. Now extend that out over 30 years and you've got one hell of a lot of money being paid for a house. Actually, the way it works is a $450K house will cost $1.08 million by the time its been paid off at those numbers.

That's insane.
So I think we'll start a little smaller and build it up from there. Get land (more than we need if at all possible), build a basic living structure or buy a double wide to live in while the house is slowly constructed. Sounds like fun, eh? Yeah, that's what I thought too. But it beats essentially setting fire to my monthly rent, doesn't it? Its got to.

And there's the other side, that once you own your own land, no one can tell you that you can't have dogs and cats or whatever else you want (within reason, of course). So now its just a question of where we throw down roots and start making a home. I can't wait.

By the way, go and read Gudy for more on the joys of home construction.

Blogging Birthday News
Everyone wish Wil Wheaton (yeah, of Star Trek: TNG fame) who also happens to write a blog. Well today's his 31st birthday, I think. Its a shame he pulled the comments from his blog because that was half the fun of reading up on him. Anyway, Happy Birthday, Wil!

Parking Lot Fun
Okay, this is only partly fun and is also partly a response to people that park their cars like drunk circus monkeys. And yes, this is a peculiar topic for someone who drives as irregularly as I do but its maddening to watch these self absorbed nimrods park badly enough to infringe on other parking spaces and then bolt.

It wasn't the regular bad parker girl who's the hair dresser with nice arms from downstairs and the pack a day habit. Though she did a stellar job, as usual of getting her car parked diagonally in a straight in space. If she's half as good a hair dresser as she is a parker then people are looking gooooooood!

Nope, today's lot abuser is someone in one of those Lexus SUV's that looks like a vitamin pill with wheels, the RX 300. And they aren't fully crooked but they did transgress over into their neighbor's space by a good foot or more. And I did get to watch someone try and get into the small space next to them. Luckily there was one of those electric golf carts cum energy efficient around town transportation (though they look stupid enough that I'd have to be drunk to get around town in one, I wonder if you can take them on the levee bike path?).

Anyway, today I wrote up a little note, printed it out in a 48 font and slipped it under their windshield wiper. I think it went something like this "NICE PARKING JOB, MAYBE NEXT TIME YOU CAN TAKE UP TWO FULL SPACES INSTEAD OF JUST BLOCKING OFF PART OF ONE."

And, with some luck, we'll be in our offices when they come back to drive away and will be able to record their reaction to getting noted. Keep your fingers crossed and we might get some good rage pics even. At least it gives us something to look forward to this afternoon.

[Update: Damn, just saw the woman come up, get in her car, see the note, take it off the windshield and drive away. No reaction at all. What fun is that? Though, if she parks her car more carefully next time then it was worth it but damn, I was hoping for some excitement. Stupid boring bad parking lady.]

In Other Righteous-Fury News
P quit her temp assignment yesterday at about noon. She'd just had far too much of the bitch in her office. One of the last straws this idiot pulled was to wait until P had left for the day and then she'd slip some of her files that needed to be filed into P's pile in the hopes that she wouldn't notice and would do her work.

Instead, P pulled them out in front of the boss and asked the bitch how they got into her stack. She denied any knowledge and then scampered her fat ass back to her desk to pretend to work.

Its been a long time coming and I'd asked P to quit a while ago because I could see how stressful dealing with her was getting. It was effecting her outside of the office as well as in it. So she finally cut the cord yesterday and is now unemployed and at home working on getting re-employed.

I'm tempted to find out what associations the bitch is in charge of at the property management office where P just quit. Then I can call her up and just scream at her for a little while before hanging up on her. And then doing it again and again. Sounds like good fun.

In Spite of the Glaring Reality
Telemarketers are Suing the Feds saying that the Do-Not-Call list that's grown to some 28 million signups in the first month or so since it opened up will destroy their industry.

Apparently the industry they were making a living in should have been destroyed a long time ago with the huge numbers of people registering to NOT get their stupid calls.

Do I feel bad for the two million jobs that are expected to be lost because of this? Yes, I feel bad for the people but I couldn't give a shit about the noxious buggers who call all the time with poorly targeted wastes of my time. Nope, we don't own the house we're in so thanks but no thanks on refinancing our mortgage. Nope, sorry, we don't have kids so I don't think we need Hooked on Phonics. Nope, sorry, I'm not interested in a "Free Vegas Vacation for Two" since there's no such thing as free and I don't buy anything from unsolicited sources as a general rule.

The telemarketing industry needed to be killed off, just as spammers need to be killed off. They help no one, steal huge sums of money legitimately and are like ants at a picnic, no one wants them around.

Boo hoo, telemarketing jackasses. Maybe you should brush up on your sex chat and move over to the you get called side of the telemarketing business?

And a Quote
How about a little wisdom from Bill Cosby to round out the day?
''I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everybody.''

Crack Nicotine in Cigarettes
As if people really needed more ammo to not smoke, here's more ammo that they don't ever want to let their hooks out of you once you start smoking.

'Crack' nicotine in cigarettes varies widely which talks about a kind of nicotine, called free-base, that's 35 times more addictive than regular nicotine (which is no slouch in the addiction department without the boost).

Think about this for a minute.
Big Tobacco is adding more crap to cigarettes to make them even more addictive so that its even harder for people to quit smoking them. And how can this be legal? How can they be allowed to basically turn ciggies into crack? How are they allowed to get away with this? Simple, they have a huge lobby in the government, paid for with the souls of millions of dead smokers.

This is the same as Kellogg's adding crack to its Frosted Flakes so that you HAVE to eat more, you HAVE to buy more and you cannot live without them.

What in the fucking hell is wrong with a government that not only exposes its populance to these predations but encourages the big companies to feast on the lives of the very people the government is supposed to be protecting?

And what about the utterly filthy scum sucking fuckwad Big Tobacco execs who approved of this plan to add more poison to their products to sell more and kill more? There can be no karmic payback for the very indisputable fact that they have intentionally killed people by supplying more and more toxic dosages of nicotine and tar.

Death's too good for them, they should be violated in the most soul sucking way possible as a start to their retribution. And they should all be forced to smoke their product all the time until they die.

That's an interesting question, how many tobacco executives are addicted to the same product they peddle?

Other News
Maybe there have been some new developments in the Kobe Bryant sexual assault case that I've not heard about yet. But a distrubingly large proportion of Kobe pic searchers coming to Intellectual Poison seem to be searching for pics of Kobe having anal sex with Katelyn Faber.

Not gonna find anything like that here, folks. Sorry but Homey don't play that. 'Sides, if I had a pic like that then I'd be peddling it to Hustler or Penthouse and making some cash off of it.

But the flood is a mere trickle of its former self. From an hourly high of 808 to the present stream of 88 per hour. Still a pretty substantial number but nothing like the whirling masses at the end of last week.

Somehow I just don't see the Bob Hope death news eliciting the same reaction from his fans as Kobe shagging a hot teenager while getting his knee scoped in Colorado. But maybe that's just me.

Motivating Liars, Frauds and Cheats
In a move that has pretty much completely befuddled me, Esquire Magazine has hired the most famous liar in recent journalistic history to write a movie review for them.
Disgraced Journalist to Review Another Media Fraud

Jayson Blair, the utterly disgraced and disgraceful fake reporter for the New York Times, has gotten a new job, writing a movie review for Esquire about a movie about a reporter who made up sources and facts. Oooh, Esquire's sooooo avant garde, so cutting edge to have thought of this.

Um, yeah, Esquire is about as cutting edge as my mortar and pestle.

This is among the dumbest ideas I've heard in a while. Not because Jayson Blair doesn't deserve to get a job and make money and all that. But because someone's letting him write again professionally. Because someone, in this case David Granger (Email Him), Esquire's editor-in-chief, is going to be pay him to write. And, in doing so, they will be encouraging legions of slackers to do exactly what Blair did, lie, cheat, fabricate, embellish and otherwise commit fraud against the people he is supposed to be reporting to. Another generation of short cutters, corner cutters and get rich quick fools who would rather gain noteriety so they can cash it in for a few precious moments in the spotlight and live on easy street from then on. And its not a bad plan really, if it works and Jayson Blair is proof that it does.

[Update: I got an email back from David Granger pointing out the same thing that Ethan does in his comment, that Jayson Blair is not being paid for this article, that money earned is going to two journalism charities and the fact that this is a one shot deal for which he is uniquely qualified. With all that borne in mind, I still think this is a bad idea because it still sends the message that you can be a fraud and still get a byline in a major national publication.]

Its not what you do that gets you on the national stage, its that you get your face and name on the national stage. Don't be surprised if someone makes Katelyn Faber famous for accusing Kobe Bryant of raping her? She'll show up in weird places and will become a household name or word, maybe she'll even be absorbed into the lexicon of America, they'll say people got Faberized or Fabered.

The thought is that it doesn't mean anything why you got your face on tv, just that you got your face on tv. That's why people will eat pureed pig's liver and all the other gnarly and horrid stuff they make people eat on Fear Factor (that and $50,000). Its why people submit stupid home videos. Its why there are always knobssitting behind home plate at baseball games waving at the camera the whole time.

So, take a few moments and write old dumb David Granger a note to let him know what a terrible idea you think it is for him to be condoning the utterly despicable behaviour of his newest hire. I'm dropping him a note but don't worry, there's no chance I'd read a shitty rag like Esquire in the first place anyway.

Many Steps on the Runaway Wedding Express
Okay, first things first, I'm no longer a dark brunnette. I'm back to good fun summer hair and am more blonde now than ever before. Pics are forthcoming.

Next, we took care of our catering needs in the middle of a loud and crowded Mexican market in Watsonville that took a good half hour of driving around to find. And that included one stop at a bakery (Panderia?) for some sugared rolls, funk cake, filled turnovers and Sprite Remix (read that, Sprite, why yes we are marketing this beverage to the minority demographics and, tangentally, to all the skinny white kids who love rap music but are scared of black people, for further research, go and read up on Mountain Dew Code Red Penetration into Depressed Urban Environments, maybe it'll come up on Google).

Anyway, a lady with a pad of paper taking notes as we talked over what we wanted, when we wanted it and how we wanted it delivered and presented. And so, in theory, we are done more or less done with the catering side of the game. Of course, there will be details to iron out, there always are, but the bulk of the mission has been accomplished and I think we can cross it almost all the way off our lists.

Which only leaves 97,000 other things to do and take care of.

Another big one is the mailing of the Save the Date dealies. What had been a somewhat lukewarm creative effort really became something much cooler than either of us has thought or hoped. The design and execution of the layout and formats looks great and we will have a large number to drop in the mail tomorrow.

Because P was thinking ahead, we were also addressing invitation envelopes with the same addresses. Saves time down the road and its yet another thing to X off the lists and that's almost as good as sex right now. Speaking of which, is it normal for a man's sex drive to get turned up or down pending a wedding?

And yeah, I'm very, very blond now. I will have to shave more often (bummer, more than once a week?) but it looks excellent and is especially nice combined with another excellent haircut from P who picked up some new clippers this morning. And that means she can start working in shifts at the salon across the street from her present work. Cool beans.

Okay, plans for this week include: reviving the near dead book project, three resistance workouts, three cardio workouts, at least one good trail ride, a night of creating reception favors (which will look bitchin' if I do say so myself).

A couple of quick food notes, P made up some fried green tomatoes today that were pretty nice with a sesame miso dressing. And, there is no better fast Asian food than Charlie Hong Kong's Spicy Dan's Peanut with Teriyaki Glazed Salmon. Assuming they don't cheese it up by not putting enough sauce on (apparently an epidemic that's been resolved by the purchase of better to-go containers), it is an incredible mix of peanut spice, cilantro, bean sprout crunch and noodle. The salmon adds another dimension of flavor and then the fresh lime squeezed over it all finishes it off to perfection.

Also, I've got a review of the Sony Clie NX70 Personal Entertainment Organizer in the works.

I'll be sad to see the end of the flood of hits from the Kobe Bryant picture fun from the end of last week but that's okay. This week will have its own excitement, I'm sure.

A Simple No Would Have Sufficed
Bush Nominee for Navy Secretary Commits Suicide

The Jackholes at AOL
Ahh, there's a nice name for the dumbfuck drown-'em-in-our-stupid-promotional-cds marketing tactic that AOL has employed for years now, Jackhole - a jackass that's knocked boots with an asshole to create a jackhole. Sending out millions and millions of their CDs exhorting people to try AOL again because its SOOOOO much better than before.

Well here's some news that each and every one of us who was with AOL once and won't ever go back knows. It still sucks. Its still like sitting in the internet's wading pool amid the piss and toe fungus. AOL is slow, its oppressive and expensive. And they cost more than they need to precisely because they flood everywhere with their garbage free sign up CDs.

And, as further sign of their stupidity, today's CD came in a DVD case in the mail that I had to go and stand in line to get (oh the joy of getting a package from Steve Case, I thought he forgot my birthday again). And I also happened to get a new PS2 game that didn't have a case. So I thought it would be cake to rip the AOL junk out and replace it with stuff I actually cared to protect (by the way, AOL cd's do NOT do well against cement blocks or concrete).
But no, the label is glued on the outside with perma-glue and crappy labels so that I could spend a month peeling and rubbing the stupid address label off. And the label inside the plastic cover of the case, now replete with AOL's New and Improved Lies 8.0 (faster dissemination of your email address to their spam affiliates to maximize their profit margins).

So AOL's going to generate another monstrous pile of trash that no one wants. I mean, how many of these stupid CD's they force on people are used? More than 5%? I highly doubt it. More than 1% might be pushing it. So they are losing money on nearly every CD they mail out (and let's not forget the cost to ship things), expenses that they pass on to the AOL user. And the burden of getting rid of the millions of CDs falls on the communities they inundate with their garbage.

Yet another reason to hate the once king of the pre-packaged and sanitized internet. That and they are going to kill off Netscape. But as long as I've got my Safari I'm a happy guy (though I do wish they'd get the password issues fixed soon as re-entering passwords again and again on some sites is a wee bit of a pain in the ass.

Cheddar X-tacy!
Its another week of the growing and glowing Cheddar X, the new paradigm for regular questions that moved to the deeper end of the pool. The shallow end has too much piss and the FridayFive stinking it up. Want a little more depth in your weekly question set? Or want to be able to submit your own questions to be answered? Join up at the Cheddar X!

And now, this week's questions.

1. What are you afraid of?
Regretting my life.
Using my skin as a brake pad on a low or high side on my motorcycle up in the hills and laying off the side of the road for hours until someone comes across me.

2. What was you worst fear that you overcame?
How about picking up and moving to South Africa in the last year of apartheid. Or, I'm not sure if I can count this, rolling over the rock waterfall up at Delaveaga Park and going over the bars and tumbling down the hill but since I've not conquered the obstacle I'm not sure if it counts.

3. What's the meanest thing you've ever done?
Ooooh, let's see. My last house mate in South Africa, basically started freaking on me because I was returning to the US and she thought I was going to skip out on bills and the like so she locked off the phone and started leaving piles of dirty dishes on my bed. One day she went to work and when she came home, I was gone and every single thing that was mine in the apartment was gone as well. I never spoke to her again either. It hadn't been helped by the fact that we started sleeping together a few weeks into living together. Then I got to know her boyfriend and realized I liked him and wouldn't bang his girl. She didn't take it all that well.

4. What is your favorite taste? (and it is a shame that Ryan's out of the pocket on this one because I know he'd dig on it)
Single favorite flavor? Damn, if I only had to have one I'd have to go with bruschetta made the way I like it, with lots of spice, lots of extra flavors, mozzerella and perfect crusty bread. If only it had meat in it too, then it would be the world's perfect food for me.

5. If you could relocate your life to anywhere in the world, where would it be and why?
Several places leap to mind but they all share many of the same traits so I'm not going to name a place and will actually describe it. Near the ocean so I have beach access. Temperate meaning not too hot in the summer and not too cold in the winter. Not crowded. Not over priced and saturated with easy money millionaires (unless I'm one of them). Good mountain roads to ride motorcycles on, good mountain bike trails. Space to have several dogs, some cats and some other critters to play with.
CapeTown is one place that fits all of this. San Diego's another. Basically I need water, sun, sand, trees and some space to stretch out in.

Go and Get Some!

Acronum - the act of being overly teched out by all the abbreviations
and
Acrodim - someone who uses acronyms because they don't really know what they stand for.

And Leblanc and I came up with a fun new game, take a regularly used acronym like FTP and see what else it might stand for. My first guess was floating toilet paper and hers was fluctuating type protocol. Lots of fun to be had with this concept!

Some Good News from Maine
The news from my sister continues to be good and yesterday she was able to take her son, Nicolas, home from the hospital for the first time. Without a shunt and without an inflated head, though that might change we are hoping that he will continue to stabilize and improve. He's putting on weight pretty quickly and I'm taking that as a very good sign.

So thanks to folks who sent positive thoughts to them. They are not wholly out of the woods but each step is another movement in the right direction and its incredibly heartening to think of the deep and genuine relief everyone in my family is starting to allow themselves to feel.

Other Hoochie Big Booty Birthday News
Yep, its J. Lo's 33rd birthday today. I can only imagine what ol' Benny's gonna do for her today. I'm sure we'll see it on an upcoming episode on MTV or E! since both are just far too interested.

More Kobe News
The links to the Kobe pics are now in the nav bar on the left there, have at them. And let me know if they disappear from the site and I'll get it fixed.

But, is it a sign of guilt or payback for standing by him when Kobe Buys Wife $4 million Ring? Looks to me like the wife's getting her pay for not tossing him out after he committed adultery. So now we know how much she costs to keep.

I wish I could say this was a gift of love and respect but this is the most obvious payoff ever. And I'm going to interpret it to mean that he's definitely nursing a guilty conscience, for rape or for adultery is the question.

The Flood of Kobe Lookers
What happens when thousands and millions of people want to see what Kobe's accuser looks like?
You get more hits than ever before.
Intellectual Poison is, right now, averaging more hits in an hour than we'd previously hit for an all day high. As a result, yesterday saw well more than 1500 surfers hitting up the site. And today we're already well over a thousand hits and there's no slowdown in sight. [Update: Its not 9 am yet on the west coast and we're over 1500 hits already on the day, yeeha!] {Another Update: its 20 to 10 now and we just smashed through 2,000 hits on the day already!]
Is this what it feels like to be Layne?
Is it a shame that its almost entirely to check out the pics of Katelyn Faber that I linked to but hey, its news so surf on and check them out.

But what will happen I add another post or two to this and push the pics link further down the page? Perhaps I'll temporarily post them in the nav bar on the left.

Go Here for Kobe's Victim Pics
There are pics available of the woman who has accused Kobe Bryant of sexual assault. [Snipped content, see below.] And on another site, Colonel-Sanders, here's the best pic of her I've yet seen (she's the one on the left though I'm less and less sure its her). [Update: Apparently, according to this newstory the four pics at The Event Magazine are NOT Katelyn Faber as had been reported. As such, I've pulled all but the one pic left that is, if its to be believed, is really Katelyn Faber.]

All I've gotta say is that she's great looking in her pics, if they are to be believed. And that its a shame that her life has been forever mutated by this event and pending trial. People will hate her and love her for this without ever having any idea of who she is. Just sad really. And sad for the guy who gets to be the nameless guy in the vest with a tie and no shirt on, bummer that.

And to reiterate, I don't know if Kobe is guilty of raping her but all signs seem to indicate that the sex was less than wholly consensual.

Identity Theft: The Fastest Growing Crime in America
Identity Theft Soars, But It's Still A Low-Tech Crime
Alright, put your hands together for the biggest new crimewave to hit America (and likely other countries but they weren't covered in the study), yeah, its Identity Theft. There are some interesting forms of it too, from synthetic identity theft, where a false identity is created from stolen components; identity theft within families, which is usually kept quiet; and diabolical identity theft, where a consumer applies for a credit card or other account, runs up large charges, then claims to be the victim of an identity thief.

Now for the good news, most of the ID thefts are not online scams, they are the old fashioned freaks rooting in garbage and finding unshredded credit card reciepts, or by stealing purses or other means like it.

The big online ID theft is credit card fraud. And many numbers are traded in chat rooms like baseball cards.

One further monkey wrench in the works is the fact that lots of companies don't make it all that hard for a file to be started on someone and for the diligent ID thief to compile all the info they need to assume the ID of the mark.

This will sound alot like an echo from the post the other day but protect yourself! Get cards with fraud protection, get a credit report printed out for yourself, hire an agency to monitor your credit ratings to keep tabs on who's trying to do what with your credit. Because, once your credit's been screwed you have a serious uphill climb for a long time.

Cover your assets, shred bills once you're done with them, shred copies, use secure shopping practices and don't, above all else, give away credit information in a flippin' email!

How Do You Sell Tools?
Have some very, very hot models in bikinis and Daisy Dukes using them and add in a little slow motion camera work of the bouncing boobs of the woman working the trench compactor or jackhammer.
This came as a forward from Esther and just might make my all time favorite ads and I've not even heard the audio to the ad yet (stupid work computer has no speakers of its own).

Check it out: Quality Tool Ad, never knew angle grinders and belt sanders could be so sexy!

Unrelated but Mildly Interesting News
I just noticed that Kobe Bryant is the number one search right now and number two? Number two is Kobe Bryant's Accuser.
Interesting.
Her name's Katelyn Faber. And yes, I did find her email address, home phone number and lots of other information about her but I'm not going to post any of it here. I am totally against the bombardment and invasion of her privacy that this whole thing's brought on.

It seems like many, many people are allowing themselves to forget that she is the victim in all of this, not Kobe Bryant. He is the accused, she is the victim. She doesn't deserve to be violated as she has been after having been allegedly violated by Kobe in the first place. There are people mounting hate campaigns against her solely because she had the audacity to accuse their star basketball player of sexual assault. Hey folks, if he did rape her then he's a criminal and should be in jail, not winning yet another championship ring with the Lakers.

Consider if this had been your daughter who had been raped and now she was being vilified nationally? I would imagine that you'd have a very different perspective if you had a horde of reporters camped out just off the edge of your property.

And it will seriously delay and taint the judicial procedures.

How are they going to find a jury of Kobe's peers who aren't familiar with the case? Kind of an impossibility, eh?

But let's leave the girl alone, she's the injured party here, not Kobe Bryant, who is a liar and adulterer at the very least and is likely a rapist as well. But we can leave that for a jury to decide, think LA will riot if he goes to jail? Yep, so do I.

Big News for California Politics
Umm yeah, Gray Davis just might not be in charge of California all that much longer according to Rueters.
Calif. Close to Declaring Governor Recall Vote

Who's our best hope?
Umm, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Yep, an action movie actor is likely poised to take over one of the largest economies on the planet. But its nothing too new, is it. I mean we had Rappin' Ron Reagan a while ago now and he was a dapper cowboy actor.

Yow, what's next? Cage matches in the Senate? Paintball wars to decide on whether laws pass?
At least we'll be able to say stuff that Mini-soda's been saying for a few years now, like "Our Governor can kick your Governor's ass," and "Our Governor used to be a Terminator and Mr. Olympia and Mr. Universe, what did yours used to be?".

At least ol' ShrubCo wouldn't give California too much trouble anymore because I'm sure Georgie's a big fan of the Ahhnuld and probably scared witless (oh wait, can't be scared witless if you ain't got no wits to begin with) of the big lug.

[Update: Leblanc has very rightly pointed a much overlooked rule on the books regarding succession. The GOP that's pushing so hard to recall Davis apparently isn't aware that Davis' Lieutenant Governor will automatically succeed him so there's not gonna be any mid-term election. And all the effort and hot air is pretty much, for nothing. Thanks for the insight and the pin to pop this silliness.]

Cycling's New Tough Guy
And he wears spandex, rides a skinny tire bike and can grit his way through having a broken collarbone to win a stage in the most grueling cycling race in the world.

Today's Tour news: Armstrong Retains Lead as Hamilton Takes Glory in which Tyler Hamilton won his first ever stage of the Tour de France.

Back on July 6th, SFGate stuck a fork in him by proclaiming that Tyler Hamilton Will Likely Pull out of the Race because of the huge crash he was involved in that resulted in his collar bone being broken.

I don't know how hard it is to function with a busted collarbone but I've had plenty of other broken bones in the course of my life and not a single one them made anything easier than without it being broken. Its a testament to his mental toughness that he didn't quit as many predicted.

And it will not be the last time he's heard from on the international stage. Lance can't have all that many more tours in him and then it becomes left up to those he leaves behind.

You've gotta respect a man who battles on spite of pain, in spite of the knowledge that he won't win the Tour this year but he can still place in the top ten (he's currently 6th). He's an inspiration to many people and it seems like more people are on their bikes lately than before. Maybe the world's catching Tour Fever?

War in Iraq News
Not a whole lot of movement on the Kobe front right now pending his first court appearance but luckily ShrubCo has brought us the deaths of the number 2 and 3 most wanted Iraqi's, Saddam's sons Uday and Qusay (or however you want to spell their names since I've seen them both spelled at least three different ways already).
And, from all accounts, these were two of the most vicious and hate filled scum bag bastards on the planet.

One's favorite method of torture was to drop people into shredders, sometimes head first. And he also enjoyed using a chainsaw to chop of their feet.

These two were no benefit to anyone and the world really is a better place for their having been killed. The reporter with the word on how they died and everything got into some detail about how they made sure. One of the two had been shot in the face or had something go through his face and bash out a good portion of his teeth so they were only 90% sure it was him. The other one had no teeth missing from his manner of death and they were 100% on him.

It is heartening to know that they were attempting to disguise themselves which indicates that they were running scared before they were caught and killed. If Saddam is still kicking then I would guess he's not having a very good time with all of this. Although he must be enjoying the random violence and deaths that his loyalists are exacting on the occupation. Its not like it will stop the process but it is the same as sticking a burr under a horse's saddle, it'll piss it off even if there's not a thing it can do about it.

Okay, so how many does that leave free from the notorious deck of cards? A few and a few big ones like the Ace of Spades himself. But they're moving forward and that's the good part because the sooner its over the sooner we can move on to alerting the American public to the stew of lies, half truths and utter nonsense our current regime has seen fit to disclose.

A few monsters gone, many, many more remain.
What kind of a culture does one have to grow up in to enjoy torturing people and killing them? And so, on top of all his other crimes, I now have to pronounce that Saddam is a bad father as well. What kind of a sick fucker wants his children to grow up to be monsters like themself? What kind of bugger would inflict his own madness on those he should love and want to protect. But I guess when you've got such an utterly miswired freak of nature then it only stands to reason that his offspring will inherit a good portion of his insanity. Can you hear the marching boots now, Saddam? They're coming for you.

What? Was Vince Neil Busy?
Tommy Lee is the new face of BuyMusic.com. Okay.
So what's he got to say about people pirating music?
"When people steal music, it sucks" Oooh, insight from a deep thinking drummer.

Ooookay, perhaps it might have been a better idea to get a less dense corporate spokestar or, as the news story says, the provider of the "artist's perspective"? Translation: We paid him about $100,000 plus a percentage to come out and be our corporate shill. Isn't he rad?

Buymusic.com Parties Like It's 1999 which, I'm pretty sure, Tommy Lee thinks it still is. Or was he in jail for beating Pamela Anderson at that point. I have such a hard time keeping all the dates straight.

Anyway, BuyMusic's business model? Let's do the exact same thing as Apple did with its iTunes store only let's do it cheaper to more people and hire a rock & roller to sell it all to the kids. Will it work? Probably not but hey, let's give them a big hand for trying, eh?

Food and Shopping Among the Chronically Stinky
You know maybe I've got the next huge hit diet concept here or maybe I just live in a town where bathing's optional for most of the residents.

I was just out getting some lunch and doing a little shopping with the leftover time. I was in one of the cool little shops in downtown Santa Cruz that has all kinds of neat stuff you could buy and never find a use for.

Anyway, it was in one of these places where a couple of people happened to walk past me and I damn near puked because they smelled so overpoweringly strong. And it was nasty, at least a four or five day stink on this one big fat bugger with hairy shoulders and in a tank top so his odor could escape all the more easily.

How can these freaks NOT know they reek as badly as they do?
How can someone leave the house knowing they smell bad enough to make babies cry from forty feet?
How can they possibly rationalize smelling so offensive in public places?

If I owned a food shop downtown and one of these stinky bastards showed up, I would refuse him service and demand he get the hell out of my store. There's no reason anyone needs to reek as horribly as this man did.

Luckily, I'd already eaten or I would have had no appetite after catching a whiff of his nasty BO. I can't even begin to imagine how awful his house must smell if he smells that bad out in public. If stink were a disease then he died two weeks ago and no one told him yet. If stink were people then he'd be China. If stink were money then he'd be the richest man on earth. If stink were punishable by law then he'd never see daylight again.

Nasty bugger, I just feel bad for anyone that is related to him and can't run like hell when he approaches. And I can't even begin to imagine the hell his wife must go through being near him every day, if he was, in fact, married.

Sorry, No Kobe Rape Pics
I knew something was up this morning when I had twice as many visitors before 9 this morning than I normally get before noon.
And a quick check into the referall logs (oh the referall logs, those most favored histories of the blogger, the lifeblood by which they live) and it would appear that searches for Kobe Bryant rape pics and news has definitely taken over the hit lead from Stripperella+Nude+Pics searches.

[Update: Found out the woman's name, according to Binary Report (which has gone way overboard in printing her home address, phone number, email address and even a link to a satellite pic of her home), her name is Katelyn Kristine Faber and she's 19 years old. My guess is the Binary Report's intent is to allow thousands and thousands of NBA freak lovers to call her up and harass her. I can't condone any of it which is why I won't link to the site. People need to have some boundaries, eh?]

Sorry to say, searching campers, that I've no pics from the whole affair. Though Layne has mentioned that pro atheletes are becoming more and more offensive in their defense against this sort of thing happening. The starstruck hottie who gives it up to the star and then realizes that she had sex with him for nothing and wants a little something something to make it all worth her while.

Remember the good old days of groupies who'd bang the whole band just for the fun of it? Now they'll still bang everyone but now they want money or other forms of compensation.

And it does kind of suck to think about these guys who are the best athletes in their field, getting dogged and chased by gorgeous women who will have sex but only so they can get something in return. And isn't that the textbook definition of prostitution?

I did try and figure out what the "victim's" name is as they mentioned on CNBC this morning that all of this info was available online. But I couldn't find it, just lots of polazized folks who are defending Kobe, defending the woman or attempting to play the race card even though its completely inappropriate. This isn't a race issue as far as I can tell and the ever present race card ploy just knocks even more steam out of the race card ploy, everytime its misused it becomes a little less valuable in the places when it is appropriate to be used.

I guess my take on the whole thing is a little off center. And I'm not polarized at all really. My thinking is that Kobe's admitted the adultery which pretty much wipes out his squeaky clean public image. If his image was based on his being a good and honest family man then that's bullshit because he's an adulterer. So using his image as a defense fails because he's demonstrated and admitted that he's not as clean and honest as he's said he is. So he's both a liar and an adulterer. Did he rape the woman? Maybe, maybe not but the really huge thing right now before the court trial begins is that he cheated on his wife (who is pretty amazingly fine and either impressively or obstinately loyal for standing by him in the light of his despicable behaviour).

And then it becomes an issue of whether he forced her into sex or, as P thinks happened, they were in the act and she decided that she didn't want to be there and told him to stop. I don't think they'd gotten to the actual act but it doesn't matter either way, our laws say that a woman can say "No" at any time and the man has to stop. A law which is really kind of whacked when you get right down to it but let's leave that for another post.

The argument that she went to his room and should have expected some sexing is stupid. I've seen it in several places online and the mere fact that she went to his is implied consent at best. People can and will change their minds. What if he was being an utter asshole, is she compelled to sleep with him still because she already went to his room? What if he says, not only do you get to have sex with me but with my crew here too? Is she allowed to say "No fucking way" then? What if Kobe went to the 5th base (anal sex, come on people) and she wanted nothing to do with it? The problem is that there are far too many what if's.

But the facts are facts. Kobe had sex with her, this is a fact now as its been admitted by both sides. Kobe was married to someone else at the time, again its a fact. The "victim" has a recent history of depression and attempted suicide, fact but may not be particularly relevant here. Kobe has an sterling public image and that should be taken into account in the consideration of his relative guilt or innocence, yes, he had a sterling image but it was based on lies that have been exposed so his image cannot be used for his defense. Sure, he kept his nose clean until now but so what, he's an admitted adulterer and that means he's almost certainly done this more than once considering how long he's been on the national stage.

Do I really care all that much that a basketball player was banging some chick who worked at a snob hotel in Colorado? No, I really don't but I've been compelled to take part in the debate because there's an awful lot of conjecture and just plain idiotic logic being tossed around like it has some validity.

Is Kobe guilty of rape? I don't know. Is he guilty of adultery? Yep. Should he be judged on that aspect as well as the rape? Hell yes, he should. Just the same as if he was charged with murder but also robbed the guy too.

The Disease is Rampant Stupidity, The Cure? Simple
I'm not quite sure why spam persists. If nobody bought anything from spam then it would cease to exist by the simple and immutable laws of economics, if a project becomes financially inviable then it fails and no one does that anymore. Why are the scams that get people to enter in their credit card information, social security number and everything else the fledgling ID thief needs to get started successful? Because they need a tiny, tiny percentage of "hits" to profit. One out of a million or ten million that responds with credit cards, bank account numbers, home phone numbers and social security numbers like trained monkeys. Just one person can ruin it for everyone by letting the numbnuts know that it will work, that people will give you all the information you need to assume their identity.

What possible train of logic is permitting people to fill in their information into an email? Why on earth are these people able to get through the rest of their lives relatively unvictimized?

How do people actually fall for these scams?

Here, allow Intellectual Poison to help out. Here's a short checklist for you to use if you suspect something is wrong with an email you just got from support@ebay.com or something like it.

a. Do they ask for information that you have to use a password to change on their site?
If yes then its a scam and should be reported ASAP.
If no then continue on.
b. Do they tell you that your account is going to be closed unless you give them this information?
If yes then its a scam and these people are trying to invoke a fear of loss response to get you to give them your credit and personal information.
If no then continue on.
c. Are there numerous misspellings, grammatical errors and other flaws that might indicate that the writer had a less than college level knowledge of English?
If yes then its a scam and they figure you are too stupid to know the difference between meet and meat.
If no then continue on.
d. Is it from a company you've never heard of and/or have never done business with?
If yes then its a badly targeted scam and should be reported and deleted.
If no then you should be able to verify the validity of the email by calling them up or replying (WITHOUT YOUR CREDIT DATA IN IT, SPEEDO). Note, I don't mean replying to the email itself which is almost certainly spam, I mean to get in touch with the company being referenced in the scam spam.

How hard is it to figure out that someone's trying to weasel your personal information out of you? Not very if all accounts are to be believed. Identity theft is one of the fastest forms of crime on the internet and it makes sense really. Assuming another identity is pretty easy and is a regular part of the internet experience. Only thing is that these people are doing it offline and making alot of money by scaring, cajoling or threatening people out of their personal information.

There are ways to combat ID Theft, hire a company to monitor your credit balances and changes. Shred your reciepts before trashing them. Don't fall for obvious garbage emails that purport to be from a company you've done business with and keep an eye on that little lock in the bottom corner of your browser (or where ever it is in IE) that tells you when you're dealing with a secure page. Never, ever, ever give away any credit card information in an email. Its far too easy to steal and people have sniffers out there searching for sequences of numb